What you should not say to people - Part I

I am big on freedom of speech, maybe because I am free-spirited but of course not in someone’s path.

By Gore Ruvimbo

Human rights are a fundamental part of us but I do remember where it says individual rights should not infringe on the rights of others.

I am big on freedom of speech, maybe because I am free-spirited but of course not in someone’s path.

So welcome to the first episode what you should not openly say to people.

We have taken freedom of speech too far as a people so here is something we say and is not supposed to be said.

You have gained weight

I do understand that it is a sign of weight in some societies but allow me to educate you briefly. Weight gain is not necessarily a sign of good health or peace of mind.

I say this because it is personal to me. Bad mental health, things like stress, anxiety and depression can lead to weight gain.

This means that the person is not gaining this weight willingly but it is uncontrollable.

I recall a time I lost weight in a week, and the African community accused me of abortion, it depressed me even more then it took 14 months for me to start gaining some little weight.

The truth was I had parting fever; I was leaving a place I had called home all my life to go to my second home where everything was going to be new. No one understood because hey I was going to fly to another country.

So, you might understand what I was going through already then on top of it all there were voices in my head saying that I had lost weight, I had aborted and someone dared to say, “If you think you look sexy in that body well you not”. Yes, it hurt me.

After regaining my little weight, I had a stressful period where school was killing me and I was homesick. The pressure had me gain at least a kilogram each week.

It was terrifying. I tried basketball then I remembered it never worked I balled all my high school days yet I was still too big for my age. Then people began saying “You are gaining weight Cloud”.

That was another blow. I had tried so much to keep my weight in check. The more I thought about it the more I gained. Here is why:

• When some people are under stress their bowel movement slows down, and slow bowel movement means slow metabolism hence weight gain so yes it can not be controlled like I always say mental health is not as simple as you think.

• There is stress eating. Most stress eaters go for sugars and fats, I guess you know what that adds up to. I would crave soda, yoghurt and candy on a daily. I felt better afterwards so it was an escape.

• Medical professionals can tell that chronic stress can aid weight gain hence other people become obese. The question is, do you think they do not see it? They do but mental health is deeper than that. It can take hold of your life and all you can do is surrender.

So far from kindness, I think we can see how our freedom of speech can affect others.

People are going through the most then we run our mounts on them because we can mmmmh.

Think about it, would you appreciate someone talking about your body as if their opinion matters?

The truth is people do know what’s going on with them and their cry for help is not out loud and they are working on it just that they have not got their breakthrough yet.